Back...and forward It's been a

in

Back...and forward


It's been a while, huh? It's been a busy couple of weeks
in my world. But you know, I'm way behind in my novel
writing and it's highly doubtful I'll make it to 50,000 words,
so while I'm not giving up, I'm going to restore some much
needed balance to my life.
I've racked up some serious miles in the air recently. Just
back from Thanksgiving weekend in Boston where I got to
check out baby sister Karen's newfound life after graduation.
She seems set up pretty nicely. Cool roommates in an
old house in Brighton. A solid job programming for Raytheon.
A fancy new Jetta to get around. A brand-new YMCA gym
just down the street. A good sushi restaurant nearby. She's
probably the one member of our family you could drop down
just about anywhere and socially she'd be well-connected
in no time. I don't know Boston well, but I feel like I know
it much much better after just a few short days there.
I've been reading A Beautiful Mind and I highly suspect
that the movie starring Russell Crowe will shy away from
many of the facts of his life. Note in the trailer the text
that notes that the film is "inspired by the life of John Forbes
Nash". John Nash had several homosexual relationships,
fathered a child with a mistress who he abandoned, in a
way. All that stuff about code-breaking will probably be
fictional as well.
I'm as big a believer as anyone in the idea that movies
should not strive to imitate books to the T. They're two
different mediums. Why should painters strive for photo
realism if photographs do the job better? Important painters
felt the same way and turned to things they could do which
cameras could not, e.g. cubism. Why do people find it to be
a good thing that the Harry Potter film stays
true to the book? But in the case of A Beautiful Mind, I find
it disturbing that they'll be distorting the facts of his life
so blatantly to avoid some of the perhaps more unsavory
aspects of his life. Geniuses are often messy to portray,
difficult to live with. To make Nash out to be some sort of
saint--why not just give the character a different name, then?
It's the one problem I had with Good Will Hunting, which
is a favorite of so many. I enjoyed the film as well, but come
on, Matt Damon's character is never really challenged. The
plot gives him some paper demons to battle and triumph
over. Of course it's not his fault he was abused by his
dad. Otherwise, he's a genius. The film would have been so
much better if they gave him some real character flaws,
some real problems to overcome.
A side thought which scared me: the peak of most math
geniuses mental powers is age 30. I think it's probably
likely the same for mental powers of many sorts. Yikes!
I have two years and change to harness the peak powers
of my brain! What should I be doing to maximize that time?
I firmly believe that the next cell phone or PDA I buy that will
be worth owning will be a combination of the two. Namely, a
PDA that I can speak into like a cell phone, like the first
generation Handspring devices with the optional snap-on
cell phone attachment, except integrated. Then, hopefully,
I'll have one wireless device that syncs seamlessly with
my Outlook address book. Looks like a few candidates
are emerging. The Samsung SPH-1300 looks very promising.
Handspring is coming out with the Treo next year, which is
different in that it has a Blackberry like keyboard. If you're
thinking about getting a new cell phone or PDA, I think you
should wait for one of these suckers. True, it won't be as
small as one of those midget phones popular with the
techno-elite today, but if done properly, this next generation
device will fulfill the promise of true tech convergence in a
way that the electronics industry hasn't been able to deliver
in years.
Another cool gizmo: remember in Johnny Mnemonic
or other futuristic sci-fi hacker movies how people could
type on imaginary keyboards in the air and have their
keystrokes recognized by computers in their brains? Meet
the Senseboard Virtual Keyboard. Imagine the
strange looks you'd get from people sitting next to you on the
plane as you type in the air while wearing a pair of electronics
LCD goggles attached to a wearable computer.
I remember I had to take one Science, Technology, and Society (STS)
class in college. That stuff seems a lot more relevant now than
it seemed then, what with cloning, bioligical warfare, etc. in
the news all the time. It sure seems like society could use a
great thinker in this arena. It seems like we're all spinning our
wheels on the issues, but not furthering the debate.
Cool fact...
In most industrialized and highly educated societies, fertility has
fallen to, or below, the replacement rate of two children per
childbearing female lifetime. It is a strong indicator that
the world's population will stabilize with increased education
and development. That's a good sign. Still, it doesn't detract
from adoption, which is a new thing with me. People are all
so worried about biological clocks, but don't forget about
adoption. Give a kid a home and fight world overpopulation.
Someday, instead of driving gasoline guzzling cars, we'll drive
hydrogen fuel cell powered vehicles of all sorts. It will be a bit
sad to give up our right to high-powered sports cars, but I've
been in this "save the world" mood ever since Sept. 11. Thus
the adoption/clean air kick.
I read this about the U.S.--its population is 1/4 devout, 1/4
secular, and 1/4 mildly interested. In the wake of Sept. 11,
churches everywhere saw a spike in attendance, but now they're
back to normal.
Why use the revolving door? To keep hot or cold air from escaping
the building. Of course! Duh.
Philip Morris is going to change its name to Altria Group Inc.,
supposedly to distance themselves from their cigarette business.
But they'll still be selling cigarettes as hard as before. Just their
name is changing. Hmmm. I'd like to see them adopt Malcolm
Gladwell's suggestion and reduce the nicotine content in their
cigarettes, to make it harder for people to become chemically
addicted.
I'm feeling fairly energized. I was a bit overwhelmed there for a
bit, with lots of crazy things going on at work--a new position,
my manager of three years leaving in February, things that would
rank high on the stressor list within the workplace. In general,
I think I was feeling, mmm, small. The time away has helped.
I'm ready to kick hard this last stretch of 2002. It turns out I'll
be kept back in Seattle instead of going off to the distribution
centers this year. I have some mixed emotions about it, as
I think it's a big part of being at Amazon to go away and help
during the holiday season. It's just the right thing to do. But
I think I can make some huge progress cranking back here
in Seattle, too.
I'm ready for a year of purposeful living.

New trailer for Attack of

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New trailer for Attack of the Clones


It's a good one, borrowing music from Episode I. Hit
refresh once on your browser to bring up the page. Seems like
a much clearer storyline than in the first film.
Harry Potter opens on about 8,000 screens this
weekend. Good lord! That's the highest ever. I thought
the long run-time would limit their box office, but it doesn't
matter if you have every screen in the theater showing the
film. Just doing simple math, if you believe most of the
screenings this weekend will be 85% full, the box office
will be massive. My personal estimate for the weekend is
that the movie does $82M, which would break the record
set by The Lost World for Friday to Monday openings.
Let's say $82M to $87M.
While many are touting the fact that nearly 1 million
tickets will be sold online for this film, that in no way
should reflect online penetration of online ticketing. People
are just using any means necessary to secure a limited
commodity, and that will not be the case with 98% of
movies playing on a screen in the U.S. over the next year.
A tasty tidbit from Bill James new book, on Barry Bonds:
Barry Bonds
Certainly the most un-appreciated superstar of my lifetime;
Bonds, [Craig] Biggio, and [Rickey] Henderson the three
most un-appreciated. Probably the second- or third-best
hitter among the 100 listed left fielders (behind [Ted] Williams
and perhaps [Stan] Musial), probably the third-best baserunner
(behind Henderson and [Tim] Raines), probably the best
defensive left fielder. Griffey has always been more popular,
but Bonds has been a far, far greater player.
The ten best players of the 1990s:
1. Barry Bonds
2. Craig Biggio
3. Frank Thomas
4. Ken Griffey Jr.
5. Jeff Bagwell
6. Rafael Palmeiro
7. Barry Larkin
8. Roberto Alomar
9. Mark McGwire
10. Greg Maddux
The number two man, Biggio, is closer in value to the
number 10 man than he is to Bonds. Biggio passed
Bonds as the best player in baseball in 1997.

Missing year! Sometime earlier this

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Missing year!


Sometime earlier this year, for some reason, maybe to impress
upon some vendor that I was older than I looked, I took to telling
everyone I was 28. And somewhere along the way, I lost track of
time and started believing it myself.
Duh. Howie and Mark in L.A. are like, wait, when did you suddenly
become older than us? I'm like, let's see, 2001 minus 1974, carry
the 1, oh my god, I'm only 27! Man, what a space cadet am I.
But damn, it felt great. It's like I've lopped a year off of my life!
I have an extra year to hit all my 30 before 30 goals! No way I'll
miss out on those now. That was the highlight of the week.

Tired, pup Just returned from

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Tired, pup


Just returned from a long business trip. Two days in L.A.,
a day in NYC. An early early morning flight Tuesday, a
red-eye flight Wednesday night. Lots of late nights leading
up to the trip, pulling together Powerpoint presentations.
Stress levels were high heading into it. I don't think I could
be a salesperson for life. The constant travel wears me down,
and the constant emotional swings of trying to close deals
and then keeping your partners happy can make the
universe seem very arbitrary. All weekend, I was dreaming
about my presentations, dreaming about work.
But for the most part, things went well. A couple times today,
in cabs around NYC, I just passed out cold and woke up
completely disoriented and realized I was in NYC. I half
expected to hear Penelope Cruz whispering "Open your eyes."
I am over 12,000 words behind on my novel. That's the
one depressing thing about this month so far. I just didn't
have any time to write this past week. I tried to write
on the plane flight back and managed about 2,000
words before I zonked out. I've started to realize how much
of a marathon this will be. 50,000 words is a hell of a lot
of words.
I leave tomorrow for San Francisco for Polly's wedding. Then
next week I leave for Boston on Wednesday for Thanksgiving.
I'm back for a few days, then off to Kentucky for a few weeks
in the distribution centers for the holidays. Then back again
for perhaps a week or two before I zip off to Chicago. I
really dislike being in Airworld these days. That's a term coined
by Walter Kirn in his latest novel, Up in the Air. For
anyone who's had to travel much in their job, I highly encourage
the book. Kirn's protagonist, Ryan Bingham, is a consultant
who has a goal of accumulating one million frequent flier miles,
and along the way he doles out truths about what he terms
Airworld, the world of the constant flier. Funny stuff. I used
to enjoy being in airports in a strange way, the sense of
being on the move. Now, with all the security restrictions, I can't
stand it. It's even more of a necessary evil than ever.
Lots of people I've worked with for many years, the old-timers
at Amazon, are leaving. I missed a whole bunch of goodbye
happy hours and dinners today. And in the next few months
I know of a few more who will be moving on to new new
things. There are just a few left from when I started. I just
realized that by next March, only one person, our CEO, will
be left from the group that interviewed me for my job.
That, with all the time I'll be spending away from Seattle the
next few weeks, leaves me with the feeling I might just
float away. The key to stabilizing my mind, at least, is
isolating the next big thing for me. Without that, it will
be hard to shake this feeling I have--nostalgia? Wistfulness?
I feel like I'm passing through this town. Maybe it will
pass.
I did manage to finish the first Harry Potter book at JFK
airport this afternoon, waiting for my flight. Just in time
for the movie. Now that I've finished the book, I must
say that I still don't understand the whole craze. It's
a kids book and yet all these people older than I am are
planning massive outings to see the film. I didn't find it
particularly well-written (it uses all sorts of literary devices
that should only be tolerated by young readers) and
is no more creative or engrossing than any number of
books I read as a kid. Maybe I'm just being a big
sourpuss. I'm completely pumped if I'm Warner Bros.,
though, knowing I've got a massive movie franchise on
my hands. Serious cash cow.
Yeah, Bill James published a new Historical Baseball Abstract!
Some of the most treasured books from my childhood are earlier
versions of this book. An essential book for baseball buffs, but
even more so he is one of the few journalists out there that
has the type of counter-culture or counter-establishment
viewpoint that distinguishes all the journalists I find interesting.
Kinda like Noam Chomsky. Anyway, Bill James is probably
the most influential figure in baseball journalism in the past
10 years or so, even though his disciples are just now starting
to peek in on the periphery of baseball journalism. If you
love mathematics and baseball, get yourself a copy.
Meredith finished the Ironman in Florida. Man oh man. What
a stud.
Britney is everywhere, and these days she is all about her
cleavage. She is in the last five minute of her fifteen, and she
had better milk it for all it's worth.

The winds of change they

in

The winds of change they are a'blowin


Okay, I give. Uncle. It's been an all around shitty week, a
few brief happy moments notwithstanding. I finally waved
the white flag at the gym tonight. I felt weak the whole time
I was lifting, then I got on the treadmill and about a mile
into it I was so light-headed I had to stop and sit down.
I thought I was going to pass out, or throw up, or pass up
and throw out, or something. Diiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzy.
I sat down on the stair and held my head in a towel for
about ten minutes until I could stand up again. Not too
many weeks do I feel mentally, physically, and emotionally
beaten up, but this is one of them. I remember Virginia
Woolf writing about the feeling in Mrs. Dalloway, as if the
fabric of one's identity is being attacked at the perimeters
by a hundred scissors snipping. One tries not to let it
unravel. Eventually, if you manage to hold it together,
strength and resolve return and one goes back on the
attack. The simpler motto? When recovering from illness,
ease back into workouts. Seriously, who am I trying to
impress?
So tonight, tomorrow, it's time to retreat and lie in
the trenches. Too much stuff for me to absorb this
week, too many mind-blowing revelations, most of which
I can't share, but I am just starting to come to grips
with a whole list of things. A series of minor and major
epiphanies.
One of those happy moments: Todd and Juli came over
and baked me lasagna. I flipped through their wedding
pics. I'm glad that some of my married friends can make
time to visit. I also learned something very strange--wedding
photographers keep your negatives for something like
seven years! I can't help but think that in a few years that
higher quality digital cameras will prevent these sort of
hostage situations.
I was helping my father edit some cover letters for his
application for teaching jobs tonight. It's a very strange
thing, writing a recommendation for your parents.
Really, most of us are living recommendations for our
parents. It's not as if we're baby sea turtles, abandoned
in some nest on the beach, left to make a mad dash
across the sand with our flippers.
Salman Rushdie wrote an interesting, short article in
the NYTimes on Nov. 2. He started it:
"This isn't about Islam." The world's leaders have been
repeating this mantra for weeks, partly in the virtuous
hope of deterring reprisal attacks on innocent Muslims
living in the West, partly because if the United States
is to maintain its coalition against terror it can't afford
to suggest that Islam and terrorism are in any way
related.
The trouble with this necessary disclaimer is that it
isn't true. If this isn't about Islam, why the worldwide
Muslim demonstrations in support of Osama bin Laden
and Al Qaeda? Why did those 10,000 men armed with
swords and axes mass on the Pakistan-Afghanistan
frontier, answering some mullah's call to jihad? Why
are the war's first British casualties three Muslim men
who died fighting on the Taliban side?
He concluded it:
"The restoration of religion to the sphere of the personal,
its depoliticization, is the nettle that all Muslim societies
must grasp in order to become modern. The only aspect
of modernity interesting to the terrorists is technology,
which they see as a weapon that can be turned on its
makers. If terrorism is to be defeated, the world of Islam
must take on board the secularist-humanist principles
on which the modern is based, and without which
Muslim countries' freedom will remain a distant dream."
I seriously have a hard time following this whole war
on terrorism now. For a short period after Sept. 11, I
felt like I was on top of all the latest developments. Now
it doesn't seem like there's one good place to keep track
of everything. It's just one giant, complicated mess.
Theme of the day is "Broken" off the soundtrack for
The Insider, by Lisa Gerrard of Dead Can Dance. A hidden
gem of a soundtrack, though by its nature a movie soundtrack
not by John Williams or that isn't a rock compilation is
usually unknown. In a close second place, the track "Faith"
off that same soundtrack. I remember when I was in
high school, or was it junior high, applying for some
scholarship/recognition program, and the main essay asked
that you analyze a work of art (fiction, music, painting, etc.).
Young, naive, I chose a piece of music. I think it was some
piece by Beethoven. I wrote this exhaustively long essay,
analyzing every measure of every minute of the piece,
breaking down the key, tonality, interplay of instruments,
etc. What I realize now is that you can't really write about
music in that way. It is an emotional art form, and a language
quite different from the written word. All I can really say is
that "Broken" reflects the way I feel this week, and "Faith"
is the way I think I'll come through it.
Or "Halah" by Mazzy Star. Howie and I went to see Jesus
and Mary Chain and Mazzy Star when we were at Stanford,
and they turned out the lights and Hope Sandoval sang Halah
while tapping a tambourine against her hip. Bittersweet.
V.S. Naipaul wrote in the NYTimes Magazine on 10.28.01:
[In response to a question: What do you think were the
causes of Sept. 11?]
It had no cause. Religious hate, religions motivation, was
the primary thing. I don't think it was because of American
foreign policy. There is a passage in one of the Conrad short
stories of the East Indies where the savage finds himself with
his hands bare in the world, and he lets out a howl of anger.
I think that, in its essence, is what is happening. The world
is getting more and more out of reach of simple people
who have only religion. And the more they depend on religion,
which of course solves nothing, the more the world gets out
of reach. The oil money in the 70's gave the illusion that
power had come to the Islamic world. It was as though up
there was a divine supermarket, and at last it had become
open to people in the Muslim world. They didn't understand
that the goods that gave them power in the end were made
by another civilization. That was intolerable to accept, and
it remains intolerable.
Old, old friend Julie sent me more photos of her and Paul's
new baby. Babies are lucky. They get to sleep, eat, and
work out all the time. It's no wonder they gain weight so
quickly. It's like those marathon runners who just run
all the time, otherwise they're sleeping and eating or
just lying around while coaches give them massages.
I've worked for the same manager, Jason, for 3 years now.
That's a long time. It's funny, in the early days of Amazon,
I used to run into him late nights at the copier machine.
It would be like 11pm on a weeknight, we'd be at the
office, and we'd be walking around in our undershirts
because the central air went off at night and we'd be
roasting up on the fourth floor. I think of all the people I
know that are around my age, he is the most instinctive
business person I know.
I thought all month I wouldn't write in the weblog because I
had to work on the novel. Turns out writing the novel puts me
at my PC most evenings, and when I hit a dead spot I turn
to the weblog to try and get the word flow going again. It's
like creatus interruptus.
Um, yes, I'm behind in my novel to the tune of about 3,000 or
4,000 words. I'm on a plane most of next week so I think I'll
be able to make it up.
I'm amazed by how many random e-mails I get from people
I've never met who correct me on things on my website or
write just to comment on something. Everytime I come home
and find an e-mail from some name I've never seen before,
I think "Oh!" It's like having a random stranger show up at
your front door and tell you that you should've used more
sugar in your recipe last night. And then the person walks
away and you never see them again.

"Irony" What is postmodernism? Jackson

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"Irony"


What is postmodernism? Jackson Lears contemplates the
birth of irony in The New Republic.
Me, I've absorbed a sense of irony from the world around me.
Try defining irony. It's one of the more difficult words in the
English language to define without using the word itself.
The holidays used to cheer me up. Nowadays, they fire up
my sense of irony.
Pre-post-modern Christmas: Happy Holidays
Post-modern Christmas: "Happy Holidays" (pronounced out
loud as "quote, unquote, happy holidays."; now, for an aside
within a parenthetical--why do we say "quote, unquote" before
the phrase we are trying to put in quotes instead of saying
"quote" before the start of the quotation and "unquote" after
we've finished pronouncing the quotation? When did that whole
deal start? End of aside)
I had my first bout of holiday stress today. When I was a kid,
I had no idea what holiday stress was all about. Well, now
I know. Humbug.

Rings around Potter I really

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Rings around Potter


I really love movie soundtracks. I'm not sure for how long, but you can
listen to a lot of the Lord of the Rings soundtrack by Howard Shore
online. I can't wait to see that movie.
I am about halfway through Harry Potter, the first book, and I
still stand by my contention that Lord of the Rings kicks Harry
Potter's lightning-bolt tattoed butt. The book, maybe the movie,
maybe even the soundtrack (last great soundtrack by John
Williams? It's been a while).

Math is fun! Yeeee-ha! Mathworld

in

Math is fun!


Yeeee-ha! Mathworld is back online after a long
court battle.
Was too sick to write too much yesterday, so now I'm
2,000 words off my pace. Woozy, with a bad hack,
all this week. Very annoying. Hurts to look at my
computer monitor. I'm always disappointed in my
immune system when I get sick.
ESPN.com is causing serious javascript errors in IE6.
They need better QA.

Pant, pant I'm up to

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Pant, pant


I'm up to 8,081 words total in my novel. Man, it's hard work.
The Nanowrimo word counter lists some people over 20,000
words already. Someone claims to have 64,700 words done.
Are you kidding me? When I think of what I have written with
my 8,000 words so far, I realize 50,000 words isn't necessarily
a very long novel. But it will still be a painful getting to the
finish line.
My great breakthrough was setting the high school football
scene in the present tense.
I'm having problem finding the time to write my novel, get
my work done at the office, and leave time for working out.
In fact, I'm pretty sure my life will lose its balance this
month.
I move offices tomorrow.
I'm really, really tired. I think my biorhythms are low right now.
I'm not feeling all that peppy.

Yessss!!!!! Folks have just left.

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Yessss!!!!!


Folks have just left. Sang and I had people over to watch
Game Seven. What a series!
As soon as Grace lined that single up the middle off Rivera
to lead off the ninth inning, Adam shouted, "Rock, you've cut
him! He's bleeding! He's human!" Bittersweet since he's
an ex-Cub, but I'm glad he got the chance to play in a
World Series, and he came up big, 3-4, today.
It was awesome to see Curt Schilling dragging himself out
there for eight innings. His splitter was clearly not sinking the
way he wanted it to at the end of the game, but he was a
gamer. And then Randy Johnson. What a stud. After throwing
over one hundred pitches the night before, dragging himself
out there for 1.3 innings of relief. His arm must have felt like
a brick, and his fastball clearly lacked the usual zip, but he
just found a way to shut down the Yankees. Those two
clearly deserve the co-MVP. Those two left their arms
out on the mound.
Tony Womack, much maligned by rotisserie baseball players
everywhere for his lousy on-base-percentage, showed
that anyone can be a hero if given the chance. Throw the
stats out the window. Interestingly, the two guys who got
the clutch hits (Grace and Womack) are both lefties with
really short, compact swings. They both choke up a bit.
That's probably the type of lefty who can hit Rivera best,
considering the action of his fastball is down and into
the hands. Gonzo, with his long swing and open stance,
struggled, but fortunately the infield was in and he was able
to muscle that last pitch out even though he got jammed
yet again.
The weekend was rough on me. I was sick all weekend
and last night I woke up in the middle of the night,
feeling nauseous. I thought I was going to throw up,
but after sitting in the bathroom for a few minutes I
managed to fall back asleep. This morning I was
running a fever, light-headed. Then, somehow, the
Bears pulled out a miraculous victory against the
Browns. If Stanford, the Bears, and the Diamondbacks
had all lost I think I might have had to raid the liquor
cabinet tonight.
Wow, there's nothing quite like a game seven win,
a miracle comeback by the team you're rooting for.
For a short, happy moment, everything is right in
the world. The cares and worries of work and life
recede for a while, and you can just sit back and
share in the company of good friends.
P.S.: Jamie K., you're making the weblog tonight. For
admitting that you fell down while serving a tennis
ball. I'm trying to picture it in my head, and it's
giving me a chuckle.
P.S.S.: Byung-Hyun, you're off the hook kid. Come
back strong.

Stolen passport Yikes--a breach in

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Stolen passport


Yikes--a breach in MS Passport! You have to wonder how safe Microsoft Passport is
when every few weeks you hear about some security flaw
in Outlook, or Excel, or Internet Explorer.
Yes, security is hard. But if you want to launch a service
like Passport, that's the issue you choose to deal with.
The rewards are great, so I don't have any sympathy for
MS.
Personally, the idea of a wallet that travels with you online
is appealing, but I have felt no great need to adopt MS
Passport. As far as I can tell, it just allows me to avoid
having to type in my address and credit card. When I
first buy from some site, I like to go through the checkout
process b/c I'm trying to determine how safe it looks. And
if I've already bought from a store, I expect them to store
my credit card info anyway, so Passport doesn't buy
me much there.

Tragedy I feel so sorry

in

Tragedy


I feel so sorry for Byung Hyun Kim. I even had him on my
rotisserie baseball roster for part of this season. The guy
is 22, playing in a foreign country where he doesn't speak
the language, and because his teammates in the bullpen
are lousy he has to grow up on the biggest stage in baseball
in the most intense of pressure situations one could
imagine.
First there was the 61 pitch relief outing (just 27 pitches
fewer than Curt Schilling threw in 7 innings) in Game Four.
Probably one of the longest relief outings of the season,
throwing out strange cases like Randy Johnson coming
in to pitch relief for Schilling in a rain delayed game. Then,
one night after his tragic defeat, he's back out there with
no days of rest for another inning. It was clearly still
Brenly's best relief pitching option, but man that's rough.
I really wanted him to strike out Brosius.
Thing is, his teammates can't even speak Korean, so how
do they empathize with him, truly make him feel like he
didn't just blow the World Series for his team? I can't help
but think of Donnie Moore, who killed himself after blowing
a save in the playoffs, or Rick Ankiel, who melted down in
the playoffs last year and is still trying to make it back
to the major leagues, or Mitch Williams, who was driven
out of baseball. Kim is talented. He throws side-arm/submarine
style, can crank his pitches up over 90 mph in that style,
and has filthy movement. I hope he recovers from all of this.
It does make me think that being a closer requires not
necessarily a particular repertoire of pitches but a
different sort of psychological makeup. So much can happen
in that one inning you pitch. Usually the score is tight.
One pitch or home run can lose the game, decisively.
All the good work your teammates did can be undone
quickly, and the blame would be centered on you.
You suspect Rivera has that type of makeup, though
since he's never blown a save in the postseason, we've
never seen how he would react.

Where's my cigarette Okay, just

in

Where's my cigarette


Okay, just finished the first 1,848 words of my novel. They're
not necessarily the first words that will appear in my novel,
but it's a start. I knew it would be painful, and it hurt like
hell to sit down and write it. When you're out of practice
writing, it's difficult to string sentences together. Especially
when writing fiction, where the action has to come from
within. When you don't feel very strongly, it's like forcing
yourself to vomit. I feel spent. This will be a long, painful
month.
What's worse is that I really don't like much of what I
wrote today. Most days are like that. Anyone who doesn't
think writing is a tough job has never had to do it for a
living. Not just the first draft, but all the revisions. If I
had a craving for cigarettes, I would've smoked an
entire pack tonight.
Most of the scene I wrote today consists of the main
character getting his ass kicked.

Recycling Half of my trash

in

Recycling


Half of my trash is paper catalogs. It's amazing. The decay in the value of catalogs is massive. The response rate for paper catalogs is a giant bell-curve, but massively shifted to the left (if you treat the x-axis as time, moving left to right). The catalog is sent, a ton of orders come in the next week, and then every week the order volume decays rapidly as the prices and merchandise go out of date.
Can't wait until e-commerce supplants paper catalogs completely and I can stop recycling all these dead trees.

Can't shut up Okay, okay,

in

Can't shut up


Okay, okay, I should be working on my novel. But I must get a few things out.
The terrorists killed Halloween. Damn them! A few trick or treaters at Mayor Richard Daley's house in Chicago don't count (which makes me wonder what would happen if I could trick or treat at Bill Gates house, in his gated community--I'd probably get a copy of Windows XP professional).
I was at Dan's house for a Halloween party last night and was able to catch the end of the game yesterday. Bob Brenly screwed the pooch on that one, and Yankee haters across the nation let out a groan. Two things. Why start Curt Schilling on 3 days rest if you're going to then pull him after only 88 pitches and 7 innings? He should have been out there in the eighth inning to pitch to Spencer, Brosius, Soriano. The whole idea of starting him on 3 days rest is to try and press your advantage and win the series sooner, not later. If you hold him back to start game 7, you might as well give him 4 days rest and let him try to win the game by pitching it all the way through to the 9th. Brenly made a gutsy call to commit to start him on 3 days rest, and then backed off. I'm sure everyone's experienced that before--commit to a strategy, then back off halfway into it and switch courses, and end up worse off than if you'd committed one way or the other.
The other thing I would have done differently--Byung Hyun Kim is a side-arm submarine style pitcher. Lefties have a much easier time hitting right-handed pitchers who through that way. Granted, Kim is tough on all batters, but in 156 AB's against Kim this year he gave up 8 home runs, while in 179 AB's against Kim righties only hit 2 home runs. Swindell, the lefty, should've been in in the 9th inning. Swindell isn't exactly Steve Carlton, but at least then you force Torre's hand. He either leaves his lefties like Williams, Posada, O'Neill, and Martinez in, or he goes to his bench for a right-handed pinch hitter, of which he has no good ones. If Torre has one managerial flawy, it's his unwavering loyalty to old veterans like Luis Sojo, who he'd already used in a crucial situation, to his disadvantage, earlier in the series. Tino batted .257 against lefties this year, and .290 against righties. I suspect Torre might have gone to his bench in that case.
Well, I guess that point's debatable. Kim is their best reliever in a thin bullpen. I would lean towards trying to force Torre to use righties in that situation just b/c the righties on his bench had less power. Force them to beat you with a series of hits instead of one swing. But if Kim had retired all three lefties in the 9th we wouldn't be questioning the move. Kim scares me because he seems to survive on great movement and stuff, but not really on pinpoint control. That is, there's a much greater chance he'll serve up a fat one by mistake than someone like Rivera, who moves the ball in and out and doesn't let you beat him with the long ball. You have to hit cut fastballs off of him, either off your fists or off the plate, and that usually means you have to dink him to death. Relievers who just rely on dominant stuff are more susceptible to the long ball.
The other thing which any roto player knows is silly is to bat Mark Grace eighth. He hadn't batted there in ages. Putting a fast guy as your leadoff man is one of the most overrated baseball myths of all time. On-base-percentage is so much more important in a leadoff guy. Any decent mathematician could tell you that you should put your best hitters at the top of your lineup to maximize long-term run potential. I even saw it in my summer rec softball league, how teams would bat their best power hitters later in the lineup to let some small guys lead off (it's a more egregious error in softball since you can't steal and so few runs are scored on speed anyway). Gracie hit a homer of El Duque and should have gotten more at bats. And Womack, the speedster they put at the top of the lineup for his ability to steal bases? He got bunted over by the #2 batter in the order twice. If he's so fast, let him steal the damn base. Your number two batter in your lineup shouldn't be bunting in the first five innings.
The one thing you can't take away from the Yankees is that Jeter hit a homer off Kim, who is murder on righties. And that was Jeter's first time facing him. And Rivera is still the best post-season reliver of all time and once again he just shut people down. It sure seems like you have to manage perfectly, and be lucky, to beat the Yankees.
Damn Yankees.

Happy Halloween If you like

in

Happy Halloween


If you like animation, have a really fast Internet connection,
and about 40 minutes to spare, you might consider watching
Blood: The Last Vampire today. Sputnik7 is streaming it
for free all day today, starting at 6pm EST. The movie itself
is not that great, it's more like a sketch than a film. But
the animation is gorgeous. James Cameron was a big fan.
Trick or treating is like hiking for children. I have happy
memories of trick or treating as a kid. Gathering with your
other childhood friends. My parents would buy me those
small plastic pumpkins to hold our candy (using a garbage
bag is just not right). Trying to see through the pitifully
small eyeholes in your plastic masks, we'd walk for
miles. We were like guerillas. Our parents would drive
us to the next neighborhood, drop us off, and we were
off, trying to hit every house that seemed inhabited.
Of course, we had to hit the wealthy neighborhoods,
under the simple assumption that somehow they might
offer up higher quantity or quality loot. I wonder when I
stopped trick or treating, when I determined that I was
too old to hike for free candy.
I like Sweet Tarts. Gummy Bears. The smell of a
Hershey's Chocolate bar.
Now, onto what really scares me. I committed to writing
a novel of at least 50,000 words next month, and next
month starts tomorrow. This is big news. Over 5000 people
across the country are doing it, and at last check Nanowrimo
was ranked #19 on Blogdex, which shouldn't be surprising.
The same people who set aside time to write in their
weblogs all the time are probably the best suited to
carve out an hour or two a day to write 1700 words or so.
So my weblog volume will be light the next month or so.
What is my novel about? I'm not really sure yet. I have
lots of things I'd like to write about, lots of themes I'm
interested in trying out. Given that I have to write just
about everyday, I think it will meander a bit. Maybe I'll
post it online. I haven't decided if I want to subject anyone
to having to read it.
Oh yeah. I love caramel apples with nuts on them.
That's probably the all-time best Halloween treat I
ever received. I wonder how that house could afford to
give those away.

Politics, religion, Series 7

in
Sept. 11 has raised my interest in two topics about which I know very little. Politics and religion. I was raised in the most apolitical non-religious family I know. Not that I was a pagan or anything, but those topics just never came up. I have an inherent distrust of both, not based on anything in particular, mostly because I'm naturally a skeptic. Maybe it's that I have a hard time with any ideology (not sure if that's the right word) that draws a line in the sand and tells me I must be on one side or the other, and the other side is evil, or hell, or something like that.
Everyone in the US is suddenly pledging support for Bush? Even people like Clinton and Gore are saying, I'm supporting my president, let's follow his lead. A few months ago, half the populus considered him to be somewhat of a fool. I guess we want to present a unified front to the enemy and prevent any bipartisan politics from paralyzing our government and military. I wonder how long his grace period will last.
Rich called me from New York. He met the enemy, the Series 7 exam, and passed. Now just the Series 66 remains and he'll be back in Seattle. And then the phone calls will start (actually, he can just knock on my door). "Weeg, have you heard of a stock named General Motors? Well, my people have done an exhaustive study and have reason to believe that the share price will rise 35% to 50% in the next six months. Now, you don't know me, I don't know you, so I'm going to start you off small..."
Why do I have to "please use the revolving door"? Is there something wrong with the hinged doors? Someone must know.
Okay, some of you are sick of hearing about baseball, but damn it, I love the sport. Bob Brenly decided to let Curt Schilling pitch Game 4 on 3 days rest. Randy Johnson won't go until Game 6, though, since he can only pitch one more game anyway and you might as well give him 4 days rest. Then Schilling can come back for Game 7 if necessary. Some say sending your pitchers out on 3 days rest reduces their effectiveness. I think in this case it's a great move. Look, the Diamondbacks are old. Schilling, Johnson, Grace, Gonzalez, Williams--these guys are probably not going to get a chance to win another World Series. In fact, the whole Arizona franchise is in big trouble financially. Would you rather have a moderately tired Schilling pitching or a fully rested Brian Andersen or Miguel Batista? It's a great story, the aging warhorse going out firing.
They say the hardest pitch to hit in baseball is a good fastball, but I think a good hard split-fingered fastball might be right up there. Schilling, Clemens...in the old days, Mike Scott. Nomo. It looks like a fastball, but with the minimal rotation the pitch drops at the last minute. Located properly (start it just above the knees and it ends up at your ankles) it's just unhittable.
These are the days a sports fan's plate runs full. NBA season starting (Jordan's jumpshot was flat tonight), World Series, and college and pro football. Even hockey, if you're into that. Fall TV shows are starting up. Man, I might have to invest in one of these hacked Tivo's.
I've watched all 3 episodes of Smallville, and I enjoy it. I like how they've made Lex Luthor one of Clark's best friends. I find it so true to life that your greatest enemies come from those who are at some point ostensibly close to you. You can't have a bitter enemy who happens to be someone completely unknown to you. No, the worst rifts occur with people you try for the longest time to be friends with, to the point where you overlook things that usually drive you nuts to try and maintain the illusion. Finally, someday, it all bubbles to the surface and explodes and suddenly you're bitter enemies. At least that's what I think.
What was I talking about? Oh, Smallville. They've bought themselves a season's worth of storylines by expanding the effects of the kryptonite that exploded on earth when Clark arrived. Now it has infected people all over Smallville, giving Clark a slew of super-powered villains to deal with. They've also chosen to reveal his powers slowly, so we'll get to cycle through his first flight, the beginning of his x-ray vision, and eventually, I suppose, the arrival of his heat vision and the invention of his costume, perhaps.
But it seems every episode, just as he's about to thwart the enemy, somehow there's a whole supply of kryptonite nearby and his hand start rippling and he falls collapses. They've used that a few times already, and it will start to get old real soon.
I have a one in three chance. I'm going to try and make a collect call. One of three people will appear: Alyssa Milano in a leather body-hugging one-piece outfit, Carrot Top, or David Arquette. I have a 33% chance of meeting Alyssa Milano! I can't think of better odds anywhere, and it's all thanks to AT&T.