Frivolous this All-Star game was

This All-Star game was jinxed from the start. Anastacia screwed up the words to the national anthem (rockets gave glare? gave truth through the night...?). Then the game ended in a tie. I agree with Jim Caple and all the other writers who wished the game still counted for something. No one really tries that hard to win, from the managers to the players, so it's hard for the fans to care.
Back in an age long ago, Pete Rose ran over Ray Fosse to score the winning run in the All-Star game, effectively ending Fosse's career. Ted Williams named his game-winning home run in the 1946 All-Star game after playing the entire game because he was the best player at his position, and you play your best players if you're trying to win. Back then the players and managers played the All-Star game to win.
Who really cares if everyone gets to play or not? This isn't some charity game. Sosa hit a 524 foot homer in the home run contest. Barry Bonds has an on base percentage of .562. Let them play the whole game.

Silly

The MLB rule that the All-Star team include a player from every team is ridiculous.

Not the newest VW...

I was driving behind a Passat station wagon today, and another Passat passed in the right lane. Except someone had removed some of the letters from the name of the car in back, so all that remained was ASS.

The latest BMW...

A preview shot of the upcoming BMW Z4 Roadster:

With their latest 7 series and this latest Z4, BMW has modified the styling of its cars fairly radically. A little too old school and frumpy for my taste, though the Z4 is an improvement over the Z3 which looks like a toy.

Spirited Away on DVD!

Spirited Away (by Hayao Miyazaki of Princess Mononoke and My Neighbor Totoro fame) will be out on DVD in late July or early August, even before it's out in theaters in the U.S. Yeeee-haa!
I'm hoping it will include the original Japanese soundtrack in addition to the English dub. Voices for the English dub:
Chihiro: Daveigh Chase (A.I, Lilo & Stitch)
Haku: Jason Marsden (How to Make a Monster, Baldur's Gate)
Boiler Room Man: David Ogden
Twin Witches: Suzanne Pleshette (Lion King 2, Along Came a Spider)
Chihiro's mother, Yugo: Lauren Holly (Don't Cry For Me, Any Given Sunday)
Chihiro's father, Akio: Michael Chiklis (Heavy Gear: The Animated Series, The Commish)
Lin: Susan Egab
Bathhouse Manager: John Ratzenberger (Monsters Inc, Cheers)

A new kind of hero

The Bourne Identity wasn't a great film, but one of its appeals is the pragmatic, serious nature of Jason Bourne. He's a suitable new hero for the post Sept. 11 America, which is ironic considering he's based on a character from a novel published in 1980. Bourne's character in the film can be read as a metaphor for our nation under attack. He awakens near death, with little or no memory, as many of us did after Sept. 11. Who is Al Qaeda? Why do they want us dead? Slowly, the clues come back, and in both cases a ruthless CIA plagued by internal machinations and bickering is at the heart of things.
Bourne is the America we want to believe we are. He's not an obnoxious American stirring up trouble abroad. No, the international world is out to get him despite the fact that he just wants to get the girl and retire peacefully. Agents of all nationalities come after him in all parts of the world, including Clive Owen as The Professor, just as terrorists seem to be attacking us from cells distributed throughout the world. Wherever Bourne goes, he brings trouble to those he comes in contact with, just as many nations have mixed feelings about accepting American military, economic, and political assistance for fear of retribution from neighboring states. Bourne doesn't deserve this--his whole loss of memory came when he couldn't bring himself to complete an assassination orchestrated by the CIA. Perhaps that is where his story diverges from the truth, as the U.S. government has rarely hesitated to intervene overtly or covertly with force to achieve its ends. But that's not the hero we wish to embrace.
Like our government, Bourne is not afraid to react with deadly force when attacked, and he does so efficiently. We hope our military and intelligence agencies are equally competent.
Most of all, Bourne represents an America which just wishes to be left alone. Contrast him with our popular heroes from the 70's, 80's and 90's, like James Bond, the suave and sophisticated incarnation of the ugly American. Brash, arrogant, always dispatching his various foreign foes with a cruel, almost disdainful sense of humor. Or John Wayne, the rugged, macho American. We sense in these earlier heroes strains of the haughty, presumptious America which is what terrorists claim to be reacting to in launching its attacks.
Bourne is none of these things. He is confused--why are we under attack? He just wishes he could have a little peace and quiet. So do we all. But it's unlikely, considering a sequel is in the works. Sadly, the same fate likely awaits the rest of us.

Macintosh pop-up killer

Has anyone found a free, effective Macintosh-compatible pop-up window killer? I am so damn sick of Orbitz ads popping up everywhere I go.

Conventional wisdom

My mind gravitates towards ideas that revoke conventional wisdom. I enjoy articles like the one about the health of low-carb vs. low-fat diets which I cite below, ideas like the ones Stephen Wolfram postulates in A New Kind of Science, and some of the recent (last two years) writing by Voros McCracken on pitching and defense resonate with me.
Okay, I've already discussed the first two ideas before. What about Voros McCracken's ideas on pitching and defense? Voros' analysis showed that pitchers have little control over the rate of hits on balls put in play. Instead, that statistic of hits on balls put in play is much more strongly correlated with a team's defense as Rob Neyer notes when examining some of the recent research by Dick Cramer.
Voros' work does explain why so many of history's greatest pitchers have high strikeout rates. That's the best way for a pitcher to prevent a ball from being put in play and earning an out. Once a ball is hit and put in play, the chances that it falls for a hit are likely the same for Pedro Martinez as they are for Jose Lima, the team defenses behind them being equal. It gives you a greater appreciation for pitchers who have low strikeout rates who still manage to maintain low ERAs over long periods of time. There aren't many, and the ones who do almost always have to have pinpoint control.

Atkins Diet--what if it's right?

Fascinating article in the NYTimes Sunday Magazine about the Atkins diet, obesity in America, and the frightening thought that perhaps fat isn't all that bad for you but carbs are. One of the more enlightening discussions of the topic that I've read. Worth reading for folks who have been wondering how to eat healthy and lose weight, which is about 90% of people I know.
Of all I've read on the topic, this article was the most convincing in presenting evidence that casts doubt on the healthiness of a high carb, low-fat diet, commonly represented by the food pyramid taught in schools all over the country, with 6-11 servings of grains at the base and minimal fat at the apex.
The joy of the prime of cycling season is that none of this matters. I can pretty much eat whatever I want to because I'm burning off so many calories. But for the other month's out of the year, it's appealing to imagine that simple adjustments to one's diet might lead to noticeable changes in weight and long-term life expectancy.

I can't move my arms

Yesterday I went out on Lake Washington on Eric's speedboat with Todd, Juli, Aaron, and a whole crew of others. I learned some new things. First, riding in the front of a speedboat being driven at high speeds is a lot of fun. The boat angles up, and you see only the sky as you bounce around like so much loose cargo. Second, wakeboarding is exhausting on the arms (when you don't know what you're doing). After watching Travis and Jared skimming around the water with seemingly little effort, I thought "I have to have a go at that." About 15 fruitless attempts later my arms were lead and I'd imbibed a good pint of Lake Washington. Splendid good fun because everytime Eric slowly cranked up the speed on the boat, and I felt the tension of water below my board, I thought to myself, "I'm going to get it this time."
Also, it's a new challenge to look forward to this summer. A summer without a new hobby or something to learn is death. My mind is still trapped in the past, in school, at the beginning of the quarter, perusing the coursebook, looking for new classes in random subjects.
Last night I barely had the strength to shift gears in my car or turn a doorknob. This morning I couldn't push myself up out of bed. I awoke at 6:30 in the morning to try and watch Stage 2 of the Tour. For the 15 minutes before 6:30, my alarm clock was on, and some lady was chatting about some farmers who raised their chickens and cows using a particular diet that produced better tasting cheese, and I was so tired that her words actually permeated my thoughts. I dreamed I was wandering in this dark, dingy, abandoned prison, and this farmer was leading me from cell to cell, where he kept his animals. Peacocks, chickens, and goats wandered around while the farmer sprinkled feed on the ground. Felt like Hannibal Lecter's asylum, but all the time I was supremely excited to rush to the supermarket to purchase a brick of this special brand of cheese. I woke up, and for about 3 minutes I remembered the name of this brand of cheese. Meant to write it down, too. Now I've forgotten it, and frankly I can't tell what part of the dream was imagined, and what was real. Don't even know if this brand of cheese even exists.

Le Tour

The Tour de France started yesterday. The Prologue was exciting, a short 4 mile time trial. Laurent Jalabert came out with a miraculous effort to complete it in 9' 10", then Lance maxed out with an even more incredible effort to win the Prologue by two seconds in 9' 8".
People think soccer is ignored. So is cycling. With Lance in his prime and Ullrich out of this year's Tour, attacks will come from all sides. Anyone with OLNtv who isn't watching is missing out on two hours of high drama every day. What these 190 or so cyclists will do over the next three weeks is to complete the most incredible endurance event in the world. 2100 miles of cycling, sometimes up mountain grades rated at about 20%, with only two rest days.
Also, everyone seems excited that the U.S. may become competitive in international soccer. Well, the U.S. is further ahead in cycling. Many teams' have American race leaders. Of course there's Lance, but some of his former teammates have moved on to other teams to be the boss. Tyler Hamilton (2nd in the Giro D'Italia this year), Levi Leipheimer (who placed in last year's Vuelta) to name the two most well-known. Floyd Landis, one of Lance's domestiques, finished second to him in the Dauphine Libere and showed himself to be a promising climber and possible future GC contender.

T3: Rise of the Machines

Teaser trailer for Terminator 3, Rise of the Machines. When you hear the words teaser trailer, it means that someone takes music from the previous films, whips up something in a digital animation program (usually its a bunch of moving logos or patterns that end up forming the title font for the next film), and releases it to great hype. It is a fancy way of telling people the date when your film will release. In fact, this trailer is almost exactly the same as the X-Men 2 teaser trailer floating around the web.
T3 comes out July 2, 2003, if you really want to know.

The Hustler

One of my favorite movies. The new DVD has a beautiful anamorphic widescreen transfer of the 2.35 to 1 black and white picture. THX certified. I was reminded of the film as Ebert just named it the latest in his great films series. It reminds me of another of my favorite films starring Paul Newman, Cool Hand Luke.
"Fat Man, you shoot a great game of pool."
"So do you, Fast Eddie."

The Two Towers Quicktime Trailer

I hope I don't have much in common with the rabid fanboys who post at Ain't It Cool News, but one thing I must agree with them on. Quicktime is gorgeous and the best online streaming format. The Two Towers trailer, in full screen Quicktime, is very impressive.

Marilyn sings Dido

Researchers at MIT have developed a way to use artificial intelligence and videography to create video of a person speaking words they didn't necessarily utter. Their first demo clip is one of Marilyn Monroe singing Dido's Hunter. Interesting stuff, though I wish they had a stream of the clip itself. Digital revivals of dead people, or completely digitally created characters (including voices), are around the corner. Maybe not on this block or the next, but a few streets away.

Who Wants to be a Millionaire

Saw this in Slashdot.
Solve any of the following seven math problems and you win a million bucks from the Clay Mathematics Institute. Take your time--these were deemed problems for the third millenium.

  • The Riemann hypothesis: prove (or disprove!) that all the non-trivial zeroes of the Riemann zeta function lie on the critical axis (real part of s = one half).

  • The conjecture of Birch and Swinnerton-Dyer: prove (or disprove!) that the algebraic rank of an elliptic curve over Q (the rank of the group of its rational points) equals its analytic rank (the order of cancellation at 1 of its L function).

  • Is P=NP? In other words, is it possible for a deterministic Turing machine to solve in polynomial time problems which are solved by a nondeterministic Turing machine in polynomial time, or, on the contrary, is the traveling salesman problem truly "hard" in the sense that no polynomial-time algorithm exists to solve it?

  • The Poincar

Follow the director

Men in Black II looks to be a dud. The director is the surest tipoff. Barry Sonnenfeld ain't my cup of tea. David Denby of The New Yorker agrees. Of course, an even earlier tipoff was that the agents in the film wear Rockport shoes this time around.

Copying Content

From a list called "Titling Movies," over at McSweeney's:
Eradicating Auntie (1909)
Persuading Papa (1910)
Freezing Auntie (1911)
Suing Susan (1912)
Marrying Sue (1913)
Outwitting Dad (1913)
Peeping Pete (1913)
Saving Mabel's Dad (1913)
Killing Horace (1914)
Guarding Old Glory (1915)
Lifting the Ban of Coventry (1915)
Pleasing Uncle (1915)
Elevating Father (1916)
Fighting Joe (1916)
Fooling Uncle (1916)
Humanizing Mr. Winsby (1916)
Knocking Out Knockout Kelly (1916)
Bucking Broadway (1917)
Saving Raffles (1917)
Shadowing Henry (1917)
Branding Broadway (1918)
Helping McAdoo (1918)
Matching Billy (1918)
Meeting Theda Bara (1918)
Winning Grandma (1918)
Training Eve (1919)
Seeing Greenwich Village (1921)
Climbing Mount Everest (1922)
Kidding Captain Kidd (1923)
Kidding Katie (1923)
Compromising Daphne (1931)
Helping Grandma (1931)
Crashing Hollywood (1932)
Racing Strain (1932)
Running Hollywood (1932)
Crashing Broadway (1933)
Going Hollywood (1933)
Meeting Mazie (1933)
Pleasing Grandpa (1934)
Concerning Mr. Martin (1937)
Crashing Hollywood (1938)
Calling Dr. Porky (1940)
Calling Philo Vance (1940)
Calling Dr. Gillespie (1942)
Framing Father (1942)
Calling Dr. Death (1943)
Calling Wild Bill Elliott (1943)
Presenting Lily Mars (1943)
Hunting the Devil Cat (1944)
Striking Champagne (1944)
Visiting St. Louis (1944)
Calling Paul Temple (1948)
Calling Bulldog Drummond (1951)
Visiting Italy (1951)
Shaving Muggs (1953)
Calling Dr. Magoo (1956)
Crashing Las Vegas (1956)
Introducing Canada (1956)
Taming Sutton's Gal (1957)
Calling Dr. Woodpecker (1962)
Leaving Lily (1975)
Filming 'Othello' (1978)
Eating Raoul (1982)
Educating Rita (1983)
Taking Tiger Mountain (1983)
Educating Julie (1984)
Imagining October (1984)
Playing Beatie Bow (1986)
Saving Grace (1986)
Fucking Fernand (1987)
Making Mr. Right (1987)
Raising Arizona (1987)
Remembering Marilyn (1987)
Crossing Delancey (1988)
Driving Miss Daisy (1989)
Killing Dad (1989)
Finding Christina (1991)
Meeting Venus (1991)
Regarding Henry (1991)
Educating Peter (1992)
Knowing Lisa (1992)
Leaving Normal (1992)
Raising Cain (1992)
Shooting Elizabeth (1992)
Boxing Helena (1993)
Loving Lulu (1993)
Wrestling Ernest Hemingway (1993)
Guarding Tess (1994)
Killing Zoe (1994)
Conducting Mahler (1995)
Discovering Russia (1995)
Leaving Las Vegas (1995)
Losing Isaiah (1995)
Romancing Sara (1995)
Feeling Minnesota (1996)
Killing Heinz (1996)
Losing Chase (1996)
Remembering Mario (1996)
Shooting Lily (1996)
Surviving Picasso (1996)
Advising Michael (1997)
Arresting Gena (1997)
Burying Yetta (1997)
Chasing Amy (1997)
Conceiving Ada (1997)
Courting Courtney (1997)
Deconstructing Harry (1997)
Eating Las Vegas (1997)
Feeding Billy (1997)
Inventing the Abbotts (1997)
Conjuring Aurora (1998)
Divorcing Jack (1998)
Eating L.A. (1998)
Exhuming Mr. Rice (1998)
Finding Graceland (1998)
Leaving Grey (1998)
Loving Evangeline (1998)
Meeting Daddy (1998)
Mixing Nia (1998)
Paging Emma (1998)
Saving Private Ryan (1998)
Understanding Jane (1998)
Being John Malkovich (1999)
Calling Anne (1999)
Crashing Eden (1999)
Dating Rosie (1999)
Finding Kelly (1999)
Imaging Nathan (1999)
Imagining Emily (1999)
Imagining Hamlet (1999)
Killing Mrs. Tingle (1999)
Kissing Jake (1999)
Loving Jezebel (1999)
Reaching Normal (1999)
Remembering Mario (1999)
Seducing Maarya (1999)
Seeking Philip (1999)
Bleeding June (2000)
Calling Bobcat (2000)
Conjugating Niki (2000)
Delivering Milo (2000)
Dressing the Nelsons (2000)
Drowning Mona (2000)
Finding Forrester (2000)
Killing Cinderella (2000)
Orbiting Venus (2000)
Playing Mona Lisa (2000)
Saving Grace (2000)
Being Frank (2001)
Chasing Chekhov (2001)
Chasing Holden (2001)
Choosing Matthias (2001)
Conning Renee (2001)
Cutting Tom Finn (2001)
Directing Eddie (2001)
Dumping Elaine (2001)
Escaping Jersey (2001)
Exploding Oedipus (2001)
Finding Mr. Perfect (2001)
Fixing Frank (2001)
Getting Hal (2001)
Killing Castro (2001)
Killing Mrs. Duke (2001)
Kissing Jessica Stein (2001)
Kissing Paul Newman (2001)
Knowing Richard Black (2001)
Losing Grace (2001)
Losing Hope (2001)
Losing Juggles (2001)
Losing Layla (2001)
Making Metamorphosis (2001)
Returning Mickey Stern (2001)
Saving Silverman (2001)
Saving Sister Aimee (2001)
Seeking Winonas (2001)
Shooting LA (2001)
Tempting David (2001)
Blackmailing Santa (2002)
Burning Annie (2002)
Defining Maggie (2002)
Finding Joy (2002)
Killing Pablo (2002)
Making David (2002)
Missing Brendan (2002)
Nailing Vienna (2002)
Owning Mahowny (2002)
Researching Raymond Burke (2002)
Robbing 'Hef (2002)
Serving Sara (2002)
Snuffing Cinderella (2002)
Stealing Harvard (2002)
Stealing Sinatra (2002)
Understanding Virginia (2002)
Finding Nemo (2003)
Imagining Argentina (2003)
Surviving Christmas (2003)

46.8

Did a century ride (100 miles) with Tim and Jesse on Saturday. Brought a lot of gear with me in my Camelbak, two full waterbottles, toolbag, pump--I was loaded down. That meant I was heavy. Not so good on the uphills, but on the downhills heavier cyclists move faster. On one hill on the way into Enumclaw, I ripped down the hill and hit 46.8 miles per hour, my all-time top speed.
When I'm flying down hills, I think two things. One: if I should get the wobbles, or my front tire catches on something and falls off, I will likely die. Two: this is living!
Three weeks until I have to climb the Alps in France, and I'm just not in the shape I'd like to be. Frustrating. Coulda, shoulda, woulda ridden more miles. Too much work. Blah blah blah. No excuses. Salads for the next three weeks.
During a bike ride of that distance, one encounters many things. A couple hundred manhole covers and sewer grates. About several dozen instances of roadkill. And a few obnoxious hillbillies in their pickup trucks, unwilling to share a few feet of shoulder with fellow human beings on two wheels. To those $#@!%@'s who blast their horns or shout profanities or drive really close or swerve to knock us cyclists off the road, I wish a flat tire in the middle of the desert.

Hello, I'm not home

With the rise of voicemail, I imagine answering machine sales have flattened out. It means that one of the favorite scenes of filmmakers may become an anachromism. That's the scene where one character tries to reach another on the phone to apologize, or to warn them about something, and the person on the other end either refuses to answer the phone, can't get to the phone because they're in mortal danger, or misses the call because they're out. The phone clicks on and you here the voice while the filmmaker displays a closeup of the answering machine.
"Hey, it's me. Pick up if you're there. Please. I have something I have to tell you, so if you're there, it would be great if you'd pick up. [Pause] Okay, I guess you're not there. I just wanted to say that, well, I was wrong yesterday. What I said. I was, I don't know, scared. Listen, I love you. I'm crazy about you. This is killing me..."
"Fred, get out of there now! It was Johnson all along, he erased the tape. Look, I can't explain, just get out now."
[Fred is down on the floor, gagged and bound, lifting his head to stare longingly at the answering machine. All you see is the answering machine tapes spinning lazily.]

en fuego

In creative writing 101, you're taught to avoid metaphors of fire or heat because they're so cliched. "Burning passion." "Fires of inspiration." Stuff like that. One which still seems to slip through the cracks is "eyes like burning coals." I read that twice this weekend. I don't even get that one. Do eyes really look like burning coals? What do burning coals look like? I think of grilling when I think of burning coals, and no one I know has eyes that look like that.
En fuego is okay, though, but only when Dan Patrick uses it.

How to build a universe that doesn't fall apart two days later

Since Philip Dick is all the rage, here's an interesting essay by the man himself. Written in 1978.

New look

Bear with me as I reformat my weblog template. Have wanted to go with a 3-column template for a while, and finally got around to doing it tonight. Didn't use CSS--one of these days I'll sit down and figure it out, but not while I have a day job. So if there are a few stray line breaks and broken links, know that I'll fix them up over the next few weeks.
Added some links off to the right. Sites I visit regularly and which may be of interest to you. Glad to see that both Jenny and Adam have weblogs now. Clever writers, both of them, and now that they're off to the far reaches of this continent, I look forward to keeping up with them online, from afar.
Hey Jenny, how come Adam has a link to your weblog but you haven't reciprocated? =)
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers trailer was strewn all across the Net today. We'll all have that waiting for us in our holiday stockings this year. Sweet.

Minority Report

Old roomie Scott is moving back to Hawaii, so I caught up with him tonight for dinner, then we took in Minority Report. Good luck to Scott as he continues his career in surfing country.
[Sidenote: before the film, I saw one of the worst trailers I've ever seen, for a film titled Swimfan@. Jesse Bradford and Erika Christensen looked like bizarro Freddie Prinze Jr. and bizarro Julia Stiles]
Excellent film. Interesting look to the film. Spielberg put the film through a process called bleach bypass, which is does to Technicolor what bleach would do to your tie-dye t-shirt. Skin tones go from rosy to pale. He also shot some scenes on 800 ASA film, which photographers know adds grain to the picture.
I admire Tom Cruise not for his acting but primarily for his go-get-them spirit. He seems like a high energy, organized, ambitious, intense dude. Perhaps it's the Scientology. All I know is that for a guy who once starred in Top Gun and Legend, he has caught the eye of some of the leading directors in the world. When his career is over, he'll be able to say that he starred in films by:
Steven Spielberg
Cameron Crowe
Ron Howard
David Finsher
Stanley Kubrick
John Woo
Paul Thomas Anderson
Martin Scorsese
Oliver Stone
Barry Levinson
Sydney Pollack
Rob Reiner
Neil Jordan
Brian De Palma
That is the definition of a list that is "long and distinguished," a phrase usually reserved for my roster of ex-girlfriends. There's no one better at playing the young hotshot than Cruise--I'd like to channel some of that energy in my own life.
Philip K. Dick--would he enjoy all the films being made from his stories? None of these movies capture the psychological complexity of his stories, but they do blow them out into high entertainment. I'm looking forward to Richard Linklater's A Scanner Darkly which is based on a Dick story and being produced by Steven Soderbergh and George Clooney. In an article in last week's NYTimes, Dick was noted as having approved of the script of Blade Runner: "[The script] bore no relation to the book. Oddly, in some ways it was better. What my story will become is one titanic lurid collision of androids being blown up, androids killing humans, general confusion and murder, all very exciting to watch. Makes my book seem dull by comparison."
Of course, he then added, "As a writer, though, I'd like to see some of my ideas, not just special effects of my ideas, used."
Popcorn, soda, action

Some new movie trailers: Daredevil (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner), Red Dragon (remake of the prequel to Silence of the Lambs), Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, the final Austin Powers in: Goldmember trailer, a new xXx trailer (Vin Diesel as the Gen-X James Bond), and a real teaser for Solaris (Steven Soderbergh, James Cameron, George Clooney).
Ah, you gotta love the debut of summer popcorn movie season. The trailers don't disappoint, though many of these movies will. Daredevil's costume looks terrible, and Ben Affleck does not fit my mental picture of Matt Murdock. Jennifer Garner is a babe, but she doesn't have the dangerous, slightly crazed bloodlust of Elektra. Red Dragon is a money making ploy. It doesn't need to be made, as Manhunter already covered the story effectively, minus the big stars. Ed Norton is great, but he looks like a scrawny kid compared to William Petersen who played Will Graham in the original. Hannibal Lecter as played by Anthony Hopkins would eat Norton for an appetizer.
Cheers, Lance

Had a small dinner to send off Lance on Thursday. He's off the the UK for a new job with Vodafone, and it will be sad to see him off. Lots and lots of friends from Amazon and Seattle are moving on, leaving town.
I will miss Lance's wry, understated British humor. A more pleasant chap you'll seldom meet. I'm sure a successful career awaits him in the UK, and I've his promise that when I visit the UK I'll be able to crash his flat and go for a spin in his new M5. Good taste in cars, that Lance.
Tick tock

Women have their biological clocks. I have a clock, too. It's the one that says I better make something of myself before my useful years of brainpower fade away. Can't tell if the clock is ticking louder recently, or faster. I feel like Captain Hook.

Envy

Orson Welles directed Citizen Kane at the age of 25. I think it takes a certain single-mindedness and courage, or obliviousness, to achieve greatness at such a young age. I think I lack a little of both, and it's depressing me.
I was reminded of it after watching the Seattle Symphony Night at the Oscars show, when they played clips from various classic films while projecting the film on a screen up above.

Fun with fingers

The movies, and the public, have a fascination with biometric fingerprint devices, yet they're among the least secure of ID systems out there. I was reminded of this while watching The Bourne Identity, in which Matt Damon's Jason Bourne goes to check out his safety deposit box at a Swiss bank and is asked to place his hand on a fingerprint reading LCD screen.
Japanese cryptographer Tsutomu Matsumoto was able to fool 11 leading fingerprint ID devices using a fake finger made of common household gelatin, like those used to make gummy bears.
Other researchers have been able to get a positive ID by simply breathing on the fingerprint readers, which take the combination of moisture on the reader and the oil left over from the previous actual finger as proof that a human finger is resting on the screen.
On a related note, the police lineup may be an anachronism. Experts have shown that the standard police lineup, in which six suspects are shown to a witness at once, is not as reliable as showing the witness six suspects in succession, each one alone. That's because humans tend to make relative judgments when presented with multiple suspects at once rather than evaluating each person independently. I read that in an article in the Atlantic Monthly.
I also learned that claiming to have evidence that you don't actually have is a legal interrogation method.

Minority Report

Ebert and Roeper give it two thumbs up, calling it "a masterpiece." I'm looking forward to it. I never read the Philip Dick story on which it's supposedly based, but I did read a story with a similar premise, The Demolished Man, by Alfred Bester, about society in the year 2031, when telepathics anticipate all crimes before they happen. Good book, and not to be confused with Demolition Man, a movie starring Wesley Snipes and Sylvester Stallone, and a much less impressive artistic achievement.
Ebert interviewed Spielberg and Cruise. Doesn't filmmaking sound like so much fun sometimes?
As with A.I., another Spielberg film, this one has a fairly elaborate set of websites associated with it. I visited the Precrime website and took the personality test, to see if I had what it takes to be a Precrime agent. My personality result?
"You are a perfection-seeker: You seek to be an ideal person in a perfect world. You are a reformer and a romantic, always looking at what should be rather than what it. Life has goals and a purpose for you and you find fulfillment when you accomplish something, especially when it has a place within a bigger picture."
I can't tell if that's me or not. As noted in a recent Salon article about alleged psychic John Edward, host of Crossing Over, horoscopes and fortune tellers and psychics often sound convincing but are simply playing a statistics game.

SIFF

Tonight I was going nuts because I couldn't find the battery pack for my minidisc player (and thus couldn't listen to the Steve Reich MDs that Ken sent my way). Also, I couldn't find all the SIFF tickets I bought. After waiting in an interminable line for those damn tickets, I would have thrown a fit if they disappeared.
The night went from distressing to triumphant when the battery pack turned up under my mattress and the SIFF tickets showed up in the trunk of my car, both places which just came to me after I sat down and calmed myself down. It reminds me of the Far Side panel in which a deer stands with his back to a tree while a hunter searches in the background with a rifle in hand. The caption reveals the thoughts of the deer, and it read something like, "Don't panic. Why is this guy after you? C'mon, think, think!"
It also reminds me of those studies that show if you screw up a customer order or experience but rectify it with impeccable customer service, you often end up with a more loyal customer than you would have if their experience had gone off without a glitch from the start. I'm going to start misplacing cash and random items in places I know I'll stumble across accidentally in the future so that my days are filled with pleasant surprises, like the beneficiaries of Amelie of Montmartre's furtive good deeds.
A list of films I'm seeing at the Seattle International Film Festival this year, for those of you who asked:
Title Date Theater
Tadpole (2) 6/4 Egyptian
Agitator (2) 6/9 Pacific Place
The Fast Runner (2) 6/10 Cinerama
The Piano Teacher (2) 6/10 Cinerama
Hi, Dharma (2) 6/12 Cinerama
Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance 6/14 Cinerama
The Rule of the Game 6/15 Harvard Exit
And the Secret Festival, which is for undisclosed films.
For you Seattle readers who decide to attend one of the films, drop me a line and I'll save a spot in line for you. I really hadn't heard of many of the films this year, so I have no idea if any of these are any good, but I used contextual clues as much as possible. Directors I've heard of, films that won awards at other film fests like Sundance or Cannes, clues like that. I was hoping Spirited Away would be one of the films, but I guess we'll have to wait for Disney to release it.

Hot

There's a moment in Unzipped, near the end, during the fashion show. A swarm of attendants are getting Linda Evangelista into an outfit before she has to hit the runway. The camera is right in her face, shooting her profile from her left. Just before she heads out, she turns and faces the camera for about three seconds, staring straight into the lens with a look of pure...it's a look that says everything about why she's on that side of the camera and you're on the other.
After seeing that movie the first time (it's a documentary about fashion designer Isaac Mizrahi), I decided that everyone needs a few supermodels and flamboyant fashion designers as friends. I still believe that, despite not knowing any.

From Underoos to thongs

Humorous flap over new thong underwear for 10 year olds, from Abercrombie and Fitch. Most humorous is the quote from company spokesperson Hampton Carney, stating that styles like the graphic thong are targeted at the same market once targeted for Underoos. Or the statement that the smallest size is merely a medium, as if that means anything for a thong.

Unfaithful

Went with Audrey to see Unfaithful today and mentally catalogued the standard visual vocabulary of suburban housewife infidelity used by director Adrian Lyne, who has covered variants of this theme in his previous films Fatal Attraction and Indecent Proposal.
The opening shot immediately employs the standard establishing images for suburban bliss: a shot of a beautiful home with a large yard, children's toys in the backyard (a bike which ominously topples in the rain), the family dog (standard prop), and the mother at work preparing breakfast. Later in the film there are other such tropes of domestic suburban life: crayon drawings by the child, tacked onto kitchen walls. As Ebert points out, "all movies involving suburban families are required to contain, a scene where the parents sit proudly in the audience while their child performs bravely in a school play." That scene occurs here.
The suburbs are where family resides. New York City, where Diane Lane's Constance Sumner has her affair, is the urban jungle where family has no place (think Jodie Foster in Panic Room for another example of family under urban assault). When a common household item makes its way from one setting to the other, Lyne makes it clear that those world's aren't supposed to mix (I won't reveal what the item is in case any of you go see the film).
Her loving, faithful family man of a husband wears sweater vests, or long-sleeve sweaters in shades of blue that only your grandfather would wear. He has a conservative haircut, is always wearing his respectable half-rimmed glasses, goes to a job which requires a tie.
Her stud of a boyfriend wears the types of sweater that male models wear, those with fancy knit patterns, and he doesn't put anything nothing on underneath. That way he can reach over his back and pull the sweater up over his head (I learned long ago that that is the way women like to see guys remove shirts and sweaters and other such tops) at a moment's notice before their next romp in the sack, or public place, as it may be. He has the type of long hair which Prada models sport, the eternal 2 day shadow, and a tattoo on his shoulder. Somehow he affords his apartment in Soho, despite evidence that he mainly deals in out of print books. Of course, he does happen to con some poor sucker out of a first print of White Fang in its original dustjacket for $1.50. He claims it's worth $4000. I guess that would cover rent in New York for about two months.
Anyway, the point is that Lyne is not exactly the most subtle filmmaker. Unfortunately, American film in general has always dealt with infidelity in one of two ways. Either the affair is justified because it's the result of true love (and the actual spouse is cruel or evil or uninspiring) or the affair causes vicious repercussions for the spouse who initiates it and everyone around him or her.
I thought of this today in particular because I caught the rerun of last week's episode of 24 and my worst suspicious were confirmed. Don't read ahead if you haven't seen the episode yet...
So it turns out Nina is the traitor. I had a feeling early in the season that she'd die, but then, last week, after the commercial mentioned that next week we'd find out who the traitor was, I knew it was Nina. That's because she had an affair with Jack. In American drama, the woman who has an affair with the otherwise loving husband always either dies or turns out to be evil. I've enjoyed 24, but it isn't without its flaws. This is one of them, that they'd fall back on this standard plot cliche. What's worse, having Nina as the double agent probably means some of the earlier episodes don't make much sense.
Of course, the series has taken lots of twists and turns. Let's hope she's pretending and isn't actually the traitor. I suspect, however, that she is. And if she dies, I guess another home-wrecker gets her just due.

The twenty seven thousandth review

Nearly every person with a weblog will mention Attack of the Clones at least once in their weblog this month. Count me in. Perhaps someday we'll look back and wonder what all the fuss was about, but the fact was that my Thursday started at 5 in the morning as I woke up and left to wait in line to hold a spot for my team from work at Cinerama for an 8am showing, and my Thursday ended as I sat in Cinerama yet again, about halfway through the 10:45pm showing.
If you haven't seen the film and don't want to read any spoilers, then this entry ends here for you.
Attack of the Clones reveals what we've all perhaps known for some time, which is that George Lucas is skilled at pointing the way for new technology in cinema and fundamentally a poor storyteller. All the dramatic highlights of Episodes I and II result from the audience's knowledge of Episodes IV through VI and not from anything on the screen itself. Which is okay for George Lucas: he did have a lot to do with those three films and he deserves whatever is coming to him.
The fundamental flaws in Episode II include an overly complex storyline, terrible acting (especially in the unconvincing central love story), and the disappearance of the sense of humor which was present in Episodes IV through VI which let the audience know that they were supposed to be having fun.
Lucas has never been a great director of actors. Unlike someone like Tarantino, who seems to always get the best out of his actors, Lucas shows no interest in the potential of acting as a discipline. His actors are props in the digital universe he is much more preoccupied with.
Natalie Portman and Hayden Christensen are better actors than this as evidenced by their other film work. Their love story is unwatchable. The only reason they hook up is that they have to or Luke and Leia will never be born and the later films will never occur. At least, that's the only reason I could spot. They have no chemistry together on screen, reading their lines as if they were in a David Mamet film, except with bad dialogue.
Some samples:
"I hate sand. It's coarse, and rough, and gets everywhere. Unlike you. You're soft, and smooth," says Anakin, as he runs his finger lightly up the bared back of Senator Amidala.
"Tell me you're suffering as much as I am," begs Anakin of Amidala, and someone in the audience shouted "We are!"
When Amidala says to Anakin, "I truly....deeply....love you" before they are sent in to the arena to be eaten by strange monsters, Anakin does a double take. "You love me?" he asks. I had to admit, I understood his surprise. Nothing in her acting would have convinced me she cared one bit about him. What's worse, it evokes wistful memories of that fantastic moment in Empire Strikes Back when Leia says to Han Solo, just before he is submerged in they cryogenic freezing chamber, "I love you."
Han Solo replies, "I know." It's a wonderful scene because everyone in the audience knows it as well.
Some critics theorize that the bad acting is a result of having to shoot most scenes in front of blue or green screens. Perhaps there is some merit to that theory, but it can't be the sole reason. Actors are constantly shooting scenes in obviously phony settings. That's why they call it acting. Ironically, or not, considering Lucas' interests, the best performance is given by Yoda, a completely digital actor.
Yes, there was bad acting in the other four Star Wars films, but Episode II plumbs new depths.
What's worse is that the first two storylines (The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones) are needlessly complex and drag along painfully until those scenes in which someone draws a lightsaber and starts kicking some ass. In that way these episodes are not unlike some of the poor martial arts films coming out of Asia, those which should be seen on DVD so that the viewer can simply jump to the fight scenes.
Episode II's plot intends to draw its suspense from a mysterious separatist movement and suspected treason amidst the Senate. Political stories can be fascinating, but only when the central conflict is clear enough so that the political machinations around the edges stand out. We're supposed to believe that Senator Palpatine, who is Darth Sidious, asked Count Dooku (or Tyrannus)10 years prior to order the creation of a clone army which would later gets approved for use by the Senate after Dooku leads a Separatist revolt with the aid of the Trade Federation (those strange bug-eyed creatures with the ethnic accents) and after Chancellor Palpatine gets voted emergency powers by the Senate after Jar Jar Binks gives what I guess is intended to be a rousing speech to the Senate. This clone army is built from the DNA of a bounty hunter named Jango Fett--it's never explained why he was chosen.
Odd that neither side has an army. What happens to the military in whatever day and age these films are supposed to take place in? Why do have to build robot or clone armies? There are probably answers to these and other questions, but they're the type of questions no one had to ask in the original trilogy. No young kid will have any idea what the storyline of this film is. It took me two viewings just to get all the details straight in my head. Clarity of plot is a good thing, and it can be had in plots both simple and complex.
The storyline of the original trilogy was clear. There were the good guys, the rebels, and they were being chased all over the galaxy by the bad guys, represented by Vader, stormtroopers, and vaguely Nazi-esque generals. Luke was trying to become a Jedi Knight with the help of Obi-Wan and Yoda. The bad guys keep trying to build Death Stars. Han Solo joins the rebels and wins the heart of Leia in a Gable-esque manner.
It's not even entirely clear who is on the side of right in Episodes I and II. Some argue that it appears that the Empire is actually in the right, and it's not a stretch to accept that argument.
Having said that, Episode II reveals glimpses of potential that the remaining film to be shot could be, if not a great film, at least the type of grand entertainment which we hope for from our best summer blockbusters. It is clearly superior to A Phantom Menace.
Unlike those in A Phantom Menace, the digital landscapes and cities in Attack of the Clones are beautiful and realistic. When I say realistic, I don't mean that they are photo-realistic. It is a particular brand of digital realism which is something entirely new and intriguing. It's still clear at times that actors are standing against green screens--you can see the unnatural delineation between the outline of the actors and the surrounding environment. But the buildings and ships and rooms themselves are beautiful and articulated, unlike those in A Phantom Menace which looked like watercolors. The long money shots that establish each setting--the gliding pan over the turbulent seas of Kamino, the city spires poking through the clouds of Coruscant in the movie's opening shots, the plunging urban chasms of Coruscant at night during the speeder chase, the enormous cathedral which Windu, Yoda and Obi-Wan stroll through, the wide open landscapes and waterfalls of Naboo--these are places I'd like to visit.
This may be a result of the digital projection system, in which case I understand why Lucas would wish that his film be shown digitally throughout the world. I have yet to see Episode II on film, and I'm not sure I wish to. Unfortunately, most films are still shot primarily on film (the special 24p HD digital camcorders with Panavision lenses designed by Sony for Lucas cost $100K each, and digital projection systems for theaters cost at least that much, so the economic equation doesn't work in favor of mass adoption) and for those movies digital projection may not offer nearly the same step up in sharpness.
John Williams devises a memorable new central theme for his score, something lacking in the score for Episode I. The soundtrack itself gives the viewers all sorts of musical cues rooted in the themes for Episode IV through VI. When Anakin loses his temper, we hear strains of Vader's imperial march.
Yoda's lightsaber scene with Dooku is the type of campy yet momentous scene which gave the original trilogy the feel of grand space opera. When Yoda pulls aside his robe and his lightsaber leaps into his right hand, the crowd cheers, giddy with anticipation to see something they haven't seen before in the trilogy. Sure, it's borderline ridiculous to see Yoda doing somersaults like the Chinese monkey king, but anyone who feels that way probably shouldn't be forking over cash to watch any of the Star Wars movies.
Episode II made an estimated $86.2 million this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, and $116.3 million since opening day. A common lament among critics when reviewing films like Episode II is that no matter what they write, the film will do good box office. Any such critic clearly doesn't take their job seriously enough.
Anyway, that's my $10. Oh wait, I saw it twice. That's my $20. Oh wait, I had to pay service charges. That's my $21.
P.S.: For those who may go see the film in the future and want to go on a visual easter egg hunt, here are some to look for courtesy of Zentertainment...

  • When Anakin and Padm

Digital clones

I'm excited to be able to see Attack of the Clones digitally projected at Cinerama opening day (tomorrow I guess!). This will be my first experience with digital projection, which George Lucas has been pushing for hard. There are two popular digital projection systems: Boeing and Texas Instruments. Cinerama will use the Boeing system. The number of theaters digitally projecting Episode II in the United States is low--something like twenty or so.
Roger Ebert, long a fan of film over digital projection, admits that based on his firsthand experience, the digital projection of Clones looks superior. He theorizes it's because Clones was shot digitally so it didn't need to be translated to film in the digital projection system (the same reason audiophiles hate to see
signals translated from analog to digital or vice versa--something is always lost in the translation, as everyone knows).

Trailers

E-mail I received:
"The first teaser to the MATRIX: RELOADED and THE MATRIX: REVOLUTIONS is set to be released on Wednesday May 15th, with its world premier on Entertainment Tonight. To see it in theaters, it will be attached to a certain film due out this week. If you miss it, don't worry, you can view it here, at www.TheMatrix.com, directly after its final airing on Entertainment Tonight. That's roughly 9pm PST, May 15th.
For this online release, we've decided to go digital... this is THE MATRIX, after all. We compressed this first teaser directly from the 2K digital source files, over 20 gigabytes of data. Why'd we bother? No scan lines, capable of far higher resolutions, zero transfer loss. More shortly."
Also, teaser for the new Bond flick, Die Another Day.
Unfortunately it's in Windows Media or Realvideo format so it's blurry.
(Update: now in beautiful, glorious Quicktime)
The trailer for Gangs of New York, the long delayed film by Martin Scorsese, features Leonardo Dicaprio trying his best to feign an Irish accent, and the return of Daniel Day Lewis from his stint as a cobbler in Europe.
A trailer, sort of, for Full Frontal, Soderbergh's new film which I'm dying to see because he shot it using equipment I might be able to access to make my own film. Though it still leaves the issue of how I'd secure Julia Roberts' time.
Trailer for Irreversible, a French film. The trailer works, really, because it's set to Beethoven.
High res Quicktime trailer for Walt Disney's animated adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson's Treasure Planet. Looks to have better animation than Atlantis: The Lost Empire did.

Oh, another thing

One thing lots of critics have admired about Spiderman is the clever wink the filmmakers toss the audience's way about male teenage sexual confusion by having Peter Parker actually develop and discover his ability to fire white streams of webs from his wrists (and by having him struggle comically to learn how to control and harness that ability--witness his inadvertent shots across the bow, as it were, when he first attempts to hit a crane from the top of a building).
What the critics didn't point out is that in the comic book, Spiderman doesn't get that ability--the saavy science whiz Peter Parker develops a web-like material which he stores in a web-shooting device which he straps to each wrist. If spider DNA really merged with Peter Parker's DNA to give him this ability, Tobey would've been shooting webs from his ass, which is how most spiders spin webs.

Could you hold

The number of telemarketers calling me at home is out of control. I've resorted to telling these folks, "Can you hold a minute?" Then I put throw my phone across the room and continue doing whatever it was that I was doing. Man it feels good.