Olympic OD

I've OD'd on the Olympics. No more. I can't watch another minute. A few impressions remain...
Google Olympic doodles
Ah, Svetlana. I didn't realize she was still competing. It feels like she's been competing at the Olympics since I was born; I haven't seen such staying power since Heather Locklear. Before the individual all-around competition, NBC aired an interview with Svetlana in which one of her statements was translated into subtitles thus: "I want to win a gold [in the all-arounds] as badly as I want to mother my own child." After she won silver, she took the time to cement her diva status by badmouthing gold medal winner Carly Patterson. I, for one, will miss the grand diva.
Sharon, Alan, and I watched the end of the women's triathlon. Kate Allen of Austria sprinted past the favored Loretta Harrop at the end to claim victory. Al Trautwig's commentary as Allen crossed the finish line: ""Here's how this went. An Australian was on vacation in Europe, fell in love with an Austrian man. They went to the pool, and this was born. And now it turns out to be a gold medal for Kate Allen and Austria." Close your eyes and hear this pronounced with Trautwig's almost self-parodying tone of gravitas, and then burst out in laughter.
The one Olympic sport I'll never take seriously is race walking. It's not just that the walkers look ridiculous because of the rule that requires them to keep at least one foot on the ground at all times. It's that the silliness is legislated into the rules. Race walking is just running with rules that force the runners to slow down to a walk. The sport is supposedly difficult and stressful, and I don't doubt that it is, but I watch the walkers and can't help thinking that I could keep up with the leaders. They look like I did that one time in Ecuador when I had some bad some bad ceviche and had to hoof it dozens of blocks back to the bathroom in my hotel room.
In contrast, who would have thought pole vaulting could be so exciting? And not just because of the opportunity to see Iceland's Thorey Elsa Elisdottir in high def? Everytime I think of pole vaulting, I think of Digman (Owen Wilson) in the classic Bottle Rocket: "Here are just a few of the key ingredients: dynamite, pole vaulting, laughing gas, choppers - can you see how incredible this is going to be? - hang gliding, come on!"
I still have no idea what happened in the Paul Hamm gymnastics controversy. Was it an adding error, as in they added numbers improperly? Or just human judgment error? Those are two very different things. In the case of the former, Hamm should return the gold. If it's the latter, then tough luck for the South Koreans. Who understands gymnastics scoring anyway? It's beyond the comprehension of non gymnastics experts, and seemingly even to those within the sport. That they display scores to the thousandths decimal point lends a deceiving precision to the whole practice of gymnastics scoring. It's not a good sign for a sport's spectator appeal when Nemov's routine appeared to most audiences to be superior to everyone else's and yet he didn't medal. People don't like to watch programs that make them feel stupid.