And yet the Michelin guy looks so friendly

In America, when I think Michelin I think tires and that white mascot (the Michelin Man) who looks like a series of different-sized Menthos glued together like a multi-tiered wedding cake, or the corporate logo love child of the Stay-puff Marshmallow Man and the Pillsbury Doughboy.
In Europe, though, Michelin means restaurant ratings, but not the warm and fuzzy democratic ratings of America's Zagat Survey. Leave restaurant evaluations to the masses? Quelle horreur! No, we're talking elite French ratings, a la "you tink weeth a credit rating like zees you ken hav zee duck? You cannot hav zee duck." Hell, a top rating only gets you 3 stars. Bertolucci's The Dreamers alone receives 4 stars from Ebert, and it's merely filmed in France.
But what a 3 stars they are. In 2003, famed chef Bernard Loiseau committed suicide, presumably because his restaurant La C