One celebrity union on the mend

With sales plunging, Mattel is reuniting Barbie with her former leading man Ken after her two year fling with Australian surf bum Blaine. After she'd originally left him...
...Ken, heartbroken, traveled the world in search of himself, making stops in Europe and the Middle East, dabbling in Buddhism and Catholicism, teaching himself to cook and slowly weaning himself off a beach bum life.
During the news conference this morning, timed to the opening of the American International Toy Fair in New York on Sunday, the new and improved Ken will emerge, restyled by a celebrity primper, Phillip Bloch, who has dressed Pierce Brosnan, Johnny Depp and Sean Combs.
Gone are Ken's outdated swimming trunks and dull T-shirts. Ken's new wardrobe will include cargo pants, a fitted suit with peak lapels and a motorcycle jacket. A facial resculpting, as Mattel calls it — Ken's first in more than a decade — will give him a more defined nose and a softer mouth.
"It's Matthew McConaughey meets Orlando Bloom," Mr. Bloch said in an interview.

Call the fashion police; if metrosexual Ken walks the streets looking like that he's going to be the love toy of a Harley Davidson biker gang faster than it takes him to do his hair in the morning. Does she know that he might be a closet fantasy geek, too?
Ken now dabbles in Buddhism, can cook, and listens to Norah Jones. Sounds to me like he's unemployed. I think she'd be far better off giving a booty call to Optimus Prime. Just look at that guy, he's got to be handy around the house. Also, he can turn into a long-hauling semi which is so convenient for those monthly trips to Costco.